Lazy Bum

Recently a buddy and I were walking along a downtown Greensboro street and, by no influence of our own, are approached by a lazy bum. This is not a "lazy bum" in the sense of someone sitting at their desk reading an amazing blog (thanks for your support)while they should be working, but a lazy bum literally.

"I know ya'll gonna smoke a blunt with a brotha'. I know I'm not as smart as you guys but..."

The replies to this lazy bum's comments are pretty much along the lines of sorry bum, we're not going to smoke a blunt with you and you're right... you're not as smart as we are. But I'm paraphrasing of course. What really shocked me about this guy is that he put forth just enough effort to be a lazy ass bum and not a bit more. His statement implies at the least, 3 things that are Unsat:

a. I'm going to smoke a blunt with a random homeless guy. False. If I were smoking, I wouldn't let a bum hit my blunt, the hell does he think this is? the 70's ??

b. That throwing in 'with a brother' would evoke some sort of sympathy. False. It only made me want to stab him in the eye with my keys.

c. That we were smarter than he was. True. Not because we happened to have attended college. Just because we happened not to be lazy ass bums who don't beg for change but beg for weed instead.


You know what really grinds my gears about the whole thing? This proves that we are truly in an age of instant gratification. Here we have a guy who most likely has no job, gets to hang out all day, and probably makes no real contribution to society. I know that these are assumptions of the worst kind... but these are based soley on the first impression. So Mr. Lazy Ass Bum, after a hard day of doing nothing, can't even muster the energy to form an intelligible sentence and ask for some spare change? It would be a far too difficult task to ask several people for loose change to accomplish the overall goal of getting high; Instead, this guy decides to beg that someone completely relinquish their investments (10 bucks, the effort of rolling, and their time) so he can reap all the benefits. What kind of world are we living in where even people who don't work feel like they're entitiled to something? It's a sad, sad day when you can't even get a bum to beg for change.

Next thing you know there will be kids expecting to get diplomas without learning to read, or women expecting to get half a guy's belongings without putting an effort into the relationship.

Oh Wait...

At least this guy had the decency to make a sign